Wednesday, 17 December 2014

API Skunking

I may not be the best at API checks, but every so often trawling through someone's mail as they apply to corp unearths a real gem. Before I share this gem, as TL;DR as it is, i guess a short discussion about management and propaganda style.

I am not one for the stirring speech, the ode to unity which is declaimed poetically prior to joining battle or tangling horns in a sov battle. I keep my corp mails short, factual, to the point and probably a bit impersonal; not to seem aloof and saturnine, atop my alabaster throne of skulls and frozen corpses yanked from imicuses in relic sites. No.

I figure, we are adult men, playing a game. We come home from work (if any of us do; I'm a bit unemployed at the moment) to escape email drudgery and administratum. More fool me running a corp and alliance, i know, but it's like an employment simulator i suppose. Nothing to do? Blow 3 days rejiggering your corp structure, POSs and sending out mails to your 8 new recruits!

So it always surprises and amuses me when you encounter a corporation run by the oratorial type nerd man, who really does invest overmuch in wear and tear on his keyboard. This provides material for EVE Skunk, though reputedly that is done by people who submit firthand. I just trawl API keys of prospective recruits.

So, here you are. Get energized and get patriotism flowing as you read the silky smooth prose of Cheterfield Fancypantz as he leaps atop his soapbox in his Captains Quarters, hand thrust gallantly into the breast of his Field marshall's Jacket, tricorne hat proudly atop his head and addresses what remains of his troops after a falling out in the alliance which saw much Q.Q. and the split up of the WHORE assets. Fear not - later on, they disentangle their wormhole living situation in a gentlemanly fashion, because it's just not done to siege out your alliance mates.

My family and soldiers.

We have been provided with an opportunity that has come with great cost. We have lost the support of the alliance and they have left us. With this opportunity we have been granted a chance to reform our ranks and solidify our core. All of the strife, arguments, and petty problems have chosen to leave the alliance and remove these problems off of our shoulders and we will be better for it in the long run.

Our leadership has spent the previous months reworking our corporation and solidifying our core infrastructure. We are prepared to take the next step in this venture. The loss of these corps at the end of the day may impact our numbers on the short term but in the long term we will be stronger for it. This gives us an opportunity to really focus on what made RAPE great, Discipline, Teamwork, Professionalism, and Dedication. Our latest stumbles were because of the lack of standards alliance wide because of the dilution of skill and our leaderships focus on building an alliance rather than a focus on building a solid core in RAPE. We need to focus on making RAPE the cornerstone of the alliance/wormhole and to do that we need everyone to buckle down and work together. Take this not as an opportunity to break and crumble, but instead an opportunity to thrive in the face of adversity and show who we really are. Proud acolytes of Bob, and proud Amarr pilots. We have always focused on tight family environment where everyone works together to accomplish goals, and we will continue to pursue those goals. Treat this not as someone chopping down our tree, but instead separating the wheat from the chaff. What is left will be stronger for it, and will grow even stronger than before.

Aiden and Deadly are prepping for training operations for logistics. This will shortly expand to all operations across the board. We are actively working on new smaller and elite fleet comps , acquiring and training both new and experienced FC’s and overall expanding our knowledge base corporation wide. We will continue to recruit quality pilots, and instead of focusing our efforts on training disloyal corporations who are selfish, we will instead focus on building up our own house. Rather than fall apart because some quality pilots left, we need to use this as a stepping stone to greatness. RAPE has had these situations before and grew stronger because of it.

In the short term while the leadership communicates about our goals and how to go about them, I encourage anyone who has unaired grievances or problems to raise them directly to leadership. If you do not feel comfortable bringing them up to me, I encourage you to voice it to any of the directorate or officers. I cannot stress it any harder than I am now. RAPE has, and always will remain strong. We have a strong core of great pilots, and a team that continues to work together not for themselves, but for the family and everyone else. RAPE has some of the best damn pilots I have ever seen, and now its time for those people to step up.

What we lost today was the individuals only interested in what THEY want, rather than the betterment of all. RAPE is better for it, and the future will only show that. The corporation will be having a meeting on sunday night to cover a lot of these issues and how we move forward. Dont hesitate to contact me about issues and concearns.

I am dissapointed in the choices made today by the corps that left, but it is hardly a death blow and instead presents an opportunity for us to rise to greatness.

Praise Bob and Victor Amarr

Chesterfield Fancypantz
CEO of RAPE, Executor of wh0re.


  1. I can't help myself, I read until I see the corp/alliance ticker and then I really can't take it serious anymore.

    I can understand people trying to come up with fun names and acronyms but the best I can think of anyone willingly associating with a corp/alliance ticker like that is as immature and childish. I don't want to be associated with those words, even in a game. (Don't get me wrong, I am not saying I am perfect and I'll be among the first to click any x-rated link in fleet but I do have standards.)
    Perhaps I am getting intolerant with old age (30+)....

    1. As a guy with Sudden Buggery, in the Prolapse. alliance with the Tubgirl ticker, I have to be wary of casting stones in this here glass house. That said, the Social justice Warriro movement on tumblr would tut tut TBGRL but a corp with an acronym RAPE in an alliance with an acronym WHORE? That's as much off-piste as mine, but in an entirely offensive to women way.

      That said, i did have a corporation called Minmatar-Amarr Man-Boy love Association [MABLA], so there you go.


Anonymous shitposting is disabled. If you want to insult me anonymously about EVE on my blog, you can fuck off.